Thursday, May 3

"You checked our shitters, honey?"

The bathroom in my wing of the office almost always has either one urinal or one stall that is out of service. It is normal. but this week, there are 2 stalls out of 4 that are broken, and 2 urinals out of 4 that are broken.

Why am I telling you this? Because, the more you know about my cube neighbor, the better I feel.

Cube Neighbor likes to complain, and has, on numerous occasions, emailed or called CBS, NBC or ABC to complain about one of his shows being cancelled. I imagine he is one of the people that complains about the Super Bowl Haft Time show also.

Anyway, this morning I come in and he is complaining to me about how our bathroom is in need of some help. So I tell him to call and complain. BIG MISTAKE. 10 minutes later I hear him on the phone with our corporate maintenance, and I thought I would share with you what I heard....

"Yeah, I would like to report a problem with the bathroom on the 4th floor."
-
"Yes, there are 2 urinals that are not working that are stinking up the place, and 2 shitters don't flush. They have been like this since Monday!"
- ( I imagine the other person is laughing by now, remember he speaks with a lisp)
"I don't understand how 2 of them were tagged as broken, but no one opened a complaint. I don't know about you, but I don't like the smell of backed up shit when I open the door."
- ( Maintenance opens a ticket and tells him they will get someone on it )
"Thank you. Will the plumber call me?"

At this point I am laughing but also puzzled as to why he wants the plumber to call HIM?! Whatever, to each his own I guess.

8 comments:

Nicole P. said...

How dare you reveal my Halloween costume so early in the year! And I'm not joking. I'm going to find a costume party and a shorty robe and I'm going to rock it.

Slinger said...

Might be hard to get the five o'clock shadow going though.

FD said...

Great Story.

Stepping Over the Junk said...

I was laughing but lost it in a fit of coughing when you mentioned his lisp!!!

Drier said...

That's a great story. He sounds like a lisping version of Dwight from "The Office."

Anonymous said...

Drier: Holy cow I never made that connection! Hilarious!

Slinger said...

Stepping over the junk: - welcome and glad I was able to brighten up your day!

Utah Dagger said...

I wish I had cubicles so I could have a Cubicle neighbor that was as bad ass as your cubicle neighbor! He doesn't take shit from anyone!