Working stiffs
As I do every weekday morning, I stood in my closet this morning thinking "what should I wear? What is the weather going to be like?" And on my way to work, as I sat in traffic, I was thinking about what other working stiffs do every morning. Then I looked around at the people around me and noticed the different worker 'types' around me...
1. "I am better, make more money, and am more important that you are" guy driving his brand new Pontiac Soltice. Ok, just because you wear a tie, use a bluetooth ear piece for your phone, and dirve a domestic sports car, does not make you important. For all I know, you work for a Pontiac dealership as a salesmen and you are driving a dealer car, as noted by the DL on the temporary plates.
2. The Lady Executive. Same as above, but she is driving the biggest and most expensive SUV while putting on her make-up. Has a ring so big it blinds me in the sun and she drives like she is driving said Soltice, weaving in and out. These ladies crack me up. They may have important jobs, but we all know after work that SUV is filled with the 3.2 kids, running around to after school events.
3. The middle class guy driving the 1993 Nissan Sentra that is burning so much oil that I feel like I just licked an ash tray, has no A/C and one burned out taillight. This guy probably has a regular job at Wal-Mart or a local factory, and is happy driving his old gas/oil burning car. He doesn't care what people think, he is just happy working his 8-4 job and providing for his family.
My point to all of this... person #3 is probably the happiest out of them all, and just the fact that there are a lot of people in the western burbs that think they should be in Hollywood. It's funny how the women in Schaumburg dress and act like they are royalty (Type #2 above)
But then I see a guy skateboarding, a GUY, not a kid. Then I think about Tony Hawk and what his normal day activity is.... Wake up, choose which board to ride, then spend the morning on the half-pipe. Eat lunch - served by the staff - then back to the pipe to perform more insane vertical tricks. Then break for a little game of his own video game, then when the kids get home, work with them on being the next Hawk to dominate the skating world. Amazing, this guy is 38, and still living his childhood dream!
I get paid to be a grunt worker and help my CEO earn his $24M bonus, and Tony skates everyday and makes millions. I know, who said life is fair? But come on, that sucks!
4 comments:
Kind-of a related story...
A rich businessman was on holiday by the beach in Mexico when a small fishing boat docked nearby with just one man on board. Inside the boat were several large tasty-looking fish.
"That's quite a fine catch," noted the businessman. "How long did it take you to pull those in?"
"Only a little while," said the fisherman.
"So why don't you stay out fishing longer and catch more fish?" said the rich man.
"This is enough to take care of the needs of my family," replied the fisherman.
"But what do you do with all the rest of your time?" asked the businessman.
The fisherman said, "I sleep late, I fish a little, I spend time with my wife and play with my children. Then I rest in the afternoon. In the evening, I visit the rest of my family or stroll into the village where I have a drink with my friends. I have a full and busy life."
The rich man scoffed. "I have a business degree from one of the best universities in the world. I can help you. If you spent more time fishing, you could buy a bigger boat with the profits you make. With the profits from the bigger boat you could buy several more boats until eventually you would own a whole fleet of fishing boats. Then instead of selling the fish to a middleman you could sell the fish directly to the processor and increase your profit margin. Eventually, you could open up your own canning factory and become a wealthy business owner. Of course, you would have to leave this village by the sea where you live and move to the capital and maybe even later to another country to manage your business."
"How long would all of that take?" the fisherman wanted to know.
"Oh, at least 15 years," replied the businessman.
"But what then?" asked the humble fisherman.
The businessman laughed and said, "That's the best part. When the time is right, you can sell your company. You would become rich. You could make millions."
"Millions!" exclaimed the fisherman. "Then what?"
"Then you could retire to a little village by the sea," said the businessman, "where you could sleep late, you could fish a little, spend time with your wife, play with your kids, then rest in the afternoon. In the evening, you could stroll into the village and have a drink with your friends. You see how wonderful things would be!"
...maybe guy #3 knows this?
Of course, a $24 million bonus would be nice, too!
BPDP
Funny story, but oh so right. Maybe I need to move to Morris and work at the Dolphin Wash to achieve my inner happiness.
Tony Hawk really has it going on. He has a real nice manse too. Have you seen his Cribs episode? That's the life!
I'm convinced that all the #2 types here, who terrorize the roads with their giant steel middle fingers of doom, are training to eventually terrorize Chicagoland (or other big city megopolis). It worked for me -- I just ignored the absurd 55 zone on I355 and kept up with traffic! That I have to pay toll to increase my chance of death by an order of magnitude is a separate rant, but...
The #1 types just plain suck. They suck like a tornado. At least here, they have the decency to drive better phallic-enhancing sports cars. They're still poseurs on the whole.
Every time I hear my higher management (er, sorry... that's "executive team" to a salaryman like me) carp on about the next great reorganization, I think about just how much less the budget will be, how much less headcount we'll have, how many more projects I'll have to lend my ample time to and how hard they try to cut corners without cutting their own compensation. All that, and a free excuse as to why they can't promote me this year.
Still, I'd much rather remain in the #3 category.
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