Top 5 Fridays - You know...for kids!
You gotta love Coen Brothers movies. Whether they are played straight (the great “Miller’s Crossing”) or purely for laughs (“The Big Lebowski”), a movie bearing the signature of Joel and Ethan is always highly entertaining* and if you’re not careful you may learn a little something too. Like, wood chippers are multifunctional. Or that Dapper Dan is a superior pomeade to rival brand Fop. Here now, I present the
Top 5 Things I Have Learned From Coen Brothers Movies
5. Sir Edmund Hillary had help climbing Mount Everest.
from Intolerable Cruelty
Wrigley: Who are you looking for?
Miles: Tenzing Norgay.
Wrigley: Tenzing Norgay? That's someone she slept with?
Miles: I doubt it Tenzing Norgay was the Sherpa that helped Edmund Hillary climb Mt Everest.
Wrigley: And Marylin knows him.
Miles: No, you idiot. Not the Tenzing Norgay. Her Tenzing Norgay.
Wrigley: I'm not sure that I actually follow that.
Miles: Few great accomplishments are achieved single-handedly, Wrigley. Most have their Norgays. Marylin Rexroth is even now climbing her Everest. I wanna find her Norgay.
Wrigley: But how do you determine which of the people on here are...
Miles: How do you spot a Norgay?
Wrigley: Yeah.
Miles: You start with the people with the funny names.
4. Shabbos is a day of rest for followers of Judaism.
from The Big Lebowski
Walter Sobchak: I told those f*%@s down at the league office a thousand times that I don't roll on Shabbos!
Donny: What's Shabbos?
Walter Sobchak: Saturday, Donny, is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That means that I don't work, I don't get in a car, I don't f*%@ing ride in a car, I don't pick up the phone, I don't turn on the oven, and I sure as shit don't f*%@ing roll! Shomer shabbos!
3. Sometimes, the blind can see...
from O Brother, Where Art Thou
Ulysses Everett McGill: The treasure is still there boys, believe me.
Delmar O'Donnell: But how'd he know about the treasure?
Ulysses Everett McGill: I don't know Delmar. The blind are reputed to possess sensitivities compensating for their lack of sight, even to the point of developing paranormal psychic powers. Now, clearly seeing into the future would fall neatly into that category; its not so surprising then that an organism deprived of its earthly vision...
Pete: He said we wouldn't get get it. He said we wouldn't get the treasure we seek on account of our ob-stac-les.
Ulysses Everett McGill: Well what the hell does he know, he's just an ignorant old man.
2. The proper way to get a smooth shave
from Miller's Crossing
Johnny Caspar: Ya put the razor in cold water, not hot—'cause metal does what in cold? . . . It contracts. 'At way you get a first-class shave.
1. Newborn babies need lots of shots
from Raising Arizona
DOT: ...and then there's diphtheria-tetanus, what they call dip-tet. You gotta get him dip-tet boosters yearly or else he'll get lockjaw and night vision. Then there's the smallpox vaccine, chicken pox and measles, and if your kid's like ours you gotta take all those shots first to get him to take 'em. Who's your pediatrician, anyway?
ED: We ain't exactly fixed on one yet. Have we Hi?
ED: ...No, I guess we don't have one yet.
DOT: Well you just gotta have one! You just gotta have one this instant!
ED: Yeah, what if the baby gets sick, honey?
DOT: Hi, even if he don't get sick he's gotta have his dip-tet!
ED: He's gotta have his dip-tet, honey.
*Intolerable Cruelty and The Ladykillers are the exceptions to the rule. They are merely “entertaining.”
2 comments:
Wha Wha WHAT?!?!?! Fargo doesn't make the top 5?? Inconceivable!
What did we learn from Fargo....you do not want that Truecoat on your car!
Jerry Lundegaard: Well, we've never done this before. But seeing as it's special circumstances and all, he says I can knock a hundred dollars of that Trucoat.
Irate Customer: One hundred... You lying to me, Mr Lundegaard. You're a bald-faced liar. A... fucking liar. Where's my goddamn cheque book?
AND...
Carl Showalter: You know, it's proven that second-hand smoke is, uh, carcin-... uh, you know, cancer related.
also they have taught us that sooner or later everyone needs a haircut. gotta love the Coen brothers.
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